Sex and Religion

'The lower part of us is still animal.' (Gandhi)

The sex impulse is the most dynamic force in human nature. So far-reaching is the sexual force that some measures of self-control is necessary even in ordinary existence. In the case of the spiritual aspirant, for whoever wants to bring his mind under complete control, a still greater measure of self-discipline is necessary. Such a powerful force in human character can be subdued only if the aspirant controls his thoughts and practises concentration. The conservation of the sexual force helps to develop this strength. For if he controls the sexual force, he will have more control over his whole make-up, over his lesser emotions.

Celibacy is one of the requirements for those who like to develop their spiritual development to perfection. However, it is not compulsory for each and every person to observe complete celibacy in order to practise Buddhism. The Buddha's advice is that observing celibacy is more congenial for a person who wants to cultivate his spiritual achievements. For ordinary Buddhist laymen, the precept is to abstain from sexual misconduct. Although perversion of the sexual force is not under this same category, the perverted person invariably suffers bad reactions either physically, or mentally or both.

There is a need for Buddhist laymen to exercise some degree of control over their sexual force. Man's sexual urge must be controlled properly otherwise man will behave worse than an animal when he is intoxicated with lust. Consider the sexual behavior of what we call the 'lower animal'. Which really is often 'lower' - The animal or the man? Which acts in a normal, regular manner as regards sexual behavior? And which runs off into all manner of irregularities and perversities? Often it is the animal that is the higher creature and man that is the lower. And why is this? It is simply because man who possesses the mental capacity which if rightly used, could make him master over his sex impulses, has actually used his mental powers in such deplorable fashion as to make himself more a slave to those impulses. Thus man can, at times, be considered lower than the animal.

Our ancestors played down this sexual impulse; they knew that it was strong enough without giving it any extra encouragement. But today we have blown it up with a thousand forms of incitation, suggestive advertisements, emphasis and display; and we have armed the sexual force with the doctrine that inhibition is dangerous and can even cause mental disorders.

Yet inhibition - the control of impulse is the first principle of any civilization. In our modern civilization, we have polluted the sexual atmosphere that surrounds us - So great is the mind-body urge for sexual gratification.

As a result of this sex exploitation by the hidden persuaders of modern society, the youth of today have developed an attitude toward sex that is becoming a public nuisance. An innocent girl has no freedom to move anywhere without being disturbed. On the other hand, females should be dressed in such a manner as not to arouse the hidden animal nature of youths.

Man is the only animal that does not have periods of natural sexual inactivity during which the body can recover its vitality. Unfortunately, commercial exploitation of the erotic nature in man has caused modern man to be exposed to a ceaseless barrage of sexual stimulation from every side. Much of the neuroses of present-day life is traceable to this unbalanced state of affairs. Men are expected to be monogamous, yet women are encouraged in every possible way to 'glamorize' themselves, not for the husband alone, but to excite in every man passions that society forbids him to indulge in.

Many societies try to enforce monogamous relationships. Thus a man with many failings can still be a moral man, meaning that he is faithful to the one wife that the law allows him to have. The danger here lies in the fact that thoughtful people who are intelligent enough to realize that these rules are artificial and not based on any transcendental, universally valid principles, are liable to fall into the error of thinking the same about all the other ethical laws.

Sex should be given its due place in normal human life; it should be neither unhealthily repressed nor morbidly exaggerated. And it should always be under the control of the will, as it can be if it is regarded sanely and placed in its proper perspective.

Sex should not be considered as the most important ingredient for one's happiness in a married life. Those who over-indulge can become slaves to sex which would ultimately ruin love and humane consideration in marriage. As in everything, one must be temperate and rational in one's sexual demands taking into consideration one another's intimate feelings and temperament.

Marriage is a bond of partnership for life entered into by a man and a woman. Patience, tolerance and understanding are the three principal qualities that should be developed and nurtured by the couple. Whilst love should be the knot tying the couple together, material necessities for sustaining a happy home should be made available by the male partner for the couple to share. The qualification for a good partnership in marriage should be 'ours' and not 'yours' or 'mine' . A good couple should 'open' their hearts to one another and to refrain from entertaining 'secrets'. Keeping secrets to oneself could lead to suspicion and suspicion is the element that could destroy love in a partnership. Suspicion breeds jealousy, jealousy creates anger, anger develops hatred, hatred turns into enmity and enmity could cause untold sufferings including bloodshed, suicide and even murder.  

Source Of Information:
《What Buddhists Believe》,  written by Venerable K Sri Dhammananda, Distributed by: Rinko Meditation Centre (净心苑）, Publication of the Yayasan Belia Buddhist Malaysia (129, Jalan Seang Tek, 10400 Pulau Pinang, Malaysia), printed in 1999.
*** The information provided above does not contain personal opinion of this blog.